12 February 2007

Marriage In College?

Today, while eating lunch, I was involved in a conversation about the possibility of being married while in college and how that would look. I think, if I got married while I was an undergrad, that it would be ok for my parents and my wife's parents to support us (financially), like they had for the beginning years of college, until we both graduated, and we were in a position to support ourselves. This idea has been received with sharp disagreement. Most people think that the moment I get married I should be responsible for my own finances, meaning that I assume the roll of sole provider for my wife and myself (i.e. I better put food on the table with my own hard-earned money). I, however, fail to see the problem with being in college and being married and having essentially no income. There are plenty of other ways that I, as a man, can provide for and lead my little family besides finances. I do not think that that would be an anti-Biblical situation by any stretch of the imagination. I do not really even think that it is a bad idea, or at least not worse than the idea of a 5 or 6 year courtship. This, of course, does not really affect me anyway since I am not in a romantic relationship, I am not about to enter a romantic relationship, and (frankly) there is nothing on the horizon. I will never be presented with an opportunity to be married in college. (Ok, never say never. Something could happen very soon, and I just have no idea it's coming at this point. God works like that sometimes, and I am not ruling that out as a possibility entirely. My point is that if things continue as they are, I will not be in a position to be married in the next 2 1/2 years.)

Here is the point of this whole line of thought as it actually applies to my life and all of yours. Why is it that I have such a great aversion to the idea of getting married while in college? Is it because getting married at that point in life really is an awful idea, or is it because I simply lack faith in Christ, who is the supreme God and ruler of the universe? How can I better bring glory and honor to the name of Christ: through the restraint I display in a long dating relationship, or in my faith that he will provide for my wife and me even when we are both full-time students? This thought could be extended to any big decision in life: missions, grad school, career, even dating relationships. Do I oppose certain changes to the status quo because they are bad, or simply because I can't trust God?

"For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not come to know God, God was well-pleased through the foolishness of the message preached to save those who believe."
~1 Corinthians 1:21

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Somewhat surprising commentation. I almost expected different, not that I'm in the position to expect anything.

I agree. I think it would be no worse that 5-6 years dating...for many people they end up slipping up physically and emotionally after so much time. Not that its impossible to remain pure. But why is it bad to be married just b/c you're in college?

For most people they don't have the option b/c they have parents like mine who refuse to support you if you get married. I don't see the difference in being in college married or single finanically either but regardless I will have to wait til I'm graduated to even think about it.

All that to say, I agree.

Noelle

Anonymous said...

I pretty much agree here, but that doesn't mean I'm planning anything, so don't take that the wrong way and tell your grandmother or whatever; it'd come back to haunt me. Run-on.